I have been participating in the On-Line Bible Studies at the Bible Cafe since they started. We just started the Beth Moore Study – Breaking Free 10th Anniversary Edition. After our last study…I was concerned about starting a new one. I really struggled with the format of the last one. I spent so much time analyzing if I was filling the blank pages right that I forgot the purpose was to get closer to God, learn more about Jesus.
Imagine my happiness when this morning I realized I HAD A BREAKTHROUGH!!! I was so excited when I realized that God was making sense…that the scales had been removed from my eyes regarding a “Hero” in my life. My Father.
I met my Father when I was 2 months away from my 16th Birthday. My mom and he had been divorced since I was a baby. My mom raised me….He played. When I met him I was instantly enamored. I loved my father. He was fun, He didn’t have rules, and He partied. When I met him it felt as if I had found that missing piece of myself.
I had been raised in the church. I had accepted Jesus as my Savior when I was 7. I loved Jesus. I went to retreats, Christian summer camps and was very active in the youth group…Until High School. I started to stray, started to change my priorities….Boys, Parties, Drugs, Alcohol became my new friends. I literally would go to a party and hear a whisper in my ear…. “Are you sure you want to do that?” I know it was Jesus. I knew he was by my side but I wanted to do what I wanted to do.
My father encouraged this in me. I allowed him to become my hero. I put him first. Before me, before school, before God, I let him become the God in my life. He passed away when I was 25 years old. It was sudden. It was sad. It, even to this day, affects me.
The only thing that could cleanse me from the sin that I participated in is Jesus’ Blood. I realized this today. I realized that I have been holding myself hostage by my sin. That I haven’t let God be God in MY Life to the fullest. I can’t change the past or what I did. I CAN accept the precious gift of Salvation. God has been restoring me. He Loves Me!! Note to self: Not All Heroes Are Positive People in Your Life. I am praying that the revelations keep coming. Not just for me but for you as well.
“Let God See That You Are Willing to Live Up To The Vision.” –Oswald Chambers
I encourage you to join us at the Bible Cafe For Women.
